milk

hey, I'm dionysus, but you can't call me
diomy title is the monarch of oral,
it can be abbreviated to moomy pronouns are I/we in first person,
you/thee in second person, they/he
in third person, and if thee be feelin'
demonstrative, this/these/that/thoseyou may know me from:
- onion bewb
- politics
- sucking dick
- fucking your dad
- no paragraphs
- incest
- blood magic
- death
- undeath
- king midasmy passion is milk
milk is my passionmy bro just texted me that I'm wise, and
he's since added unhinged and hilarious,
and that he loves me, and I love him, so
only his opinion of me will ever mattermy religious views are Jim Pickens
my favourite holiday is Death Daywhile I don't know what an anchovy or
a beluga even is, I don't support either,
and anywhere that's literally called the
black sea sounds pretty dark ngl smhtiger bread is the most problematic,
sweaty, it's literal bestiality to eat itmy ships are everything all of the time,
a little bit of everything all of the time,
and I fetishise, romanticise, and normalise
anything and everything all of the timeif I'm not drunk or stoned or high, I'm lying,
selfcest is my second passion, after milkit's always taurine time
organic, no artificial shitmy third passion is arson, after milk and
selfcest, and my fourth passion is boozethe oompa loompa shouldn't unionise,
did you even read the fucking book?my husband is The Onceler
my other husband is Loki
my wife is Ariadne
my other wife is your dadmy beloved, my darling, my yandere baby,
is the cutest guy this side of the darn sunalso dating all of your problematic faves,
and they said I'm better than you at dartswhile it truly is none of your concern,
my form is incomprehensible and sexy,
it's younger/older than your best guess,
but I do appreciate the complimentsnot american, I know it's problematic,
but respawn points are randomisedancient god, I know it's problematic,
but species is also randomisedpronoun-haver, I know it's problematic,
but I didn't read the fine print on hair dyegay bisexual, I know it's problematic,
but I attract dick and pussy constantlyex-ex-ex-smoker, i know it's problematic,
but you put the killing thing in your mouthyandere, I know it's problematic,
but your dad loves that about meme and your dad met at a furrycon,
he was a golden emu in a sea of wolveshe was attracted to my total lack of mental
health, he likes manic pixie dream bitches,
and on our second date we broke into a car
dealership to steal two matching minivansmonster energy™ is my fifth passion,
after milk, selfcest, arson, and boozemy gender reveal party was postponed,
the feds found the technicolour nukeswhy debate the smoothness of the shark,
when you can kiss the kind sea babies?walking, talking, stalking guide on how to
be yandere, aro, and polyamorous at oncedon't take life too seriously,
nobody gets out alive anywayespecially not me, girl I'm fucked,
bro I'm like literally dying for realsdni list:
- theseus
- poseidon
- hera
- your mom
- the smol dude from saw
- cops
- attack helicopters
- hypothetical violinists
- my past self
- people who call Jim Pickens a "cult"di list:
- driving intoxicated
- doodling intoxicated
- daydreaming intoxicated
- dangerously intoxicated
- ducking intoxicated (autocorrect)
- dad's infatuation
- dictatorial influence
- driving (under the) influence (of a dictator)
- diva inthestreets
- diva inthesheetsfavourite drinks:
- milk
- monster energy™
- cum
- rum
- whiskey
- coffee
- irish coffee
- the view
- cheap wine
- red bull™hashtag actually DID, hashtag actually
psychotic, hashtag actually a zombieif we're made in a god's image,
can they copystrike us?